Monday, November 15, 2010

Desperate (to be a) Housewife

Thank you Morgan for alerting me to some pressing celebrity news, my gurl JSimps got engaged over the weekend. I want to be happy for her, surely I do, but not so sure I approve. I'm feeling like this is too good to be true for poor emotionally needy Jess. I don't trust Eric - the ink isn't even dry on his divorce papers and he's already purchased a ticket on the gravy train, he knew a ring would lock her and her Macy's money down. He went to an ivy league school to play football, then played third string quarter back for a few teams, and his latest title boasts "Jessica Simpson's boyfriend with no job in sight"...clearly ambition is not his forte. And by the looks of that ring, he figured he didn't need to try too hard. A ruby on a gold band, really? He didn't even spring for classic diamond and platinum, sure sign that he didn't have much to go on with the money left from his divorce and saw giant dollar signs on Jessica's chest for his future.

I hope she's not jumping in with blind rage at the annoucement of Nick and Vanessa's engagement, those two crazy kids are solid and will definitely work out in the long run. For Jessica and lazy (but hot) Eric, the future remains to be seen. I give it less than a year before they either call off the engagement or jump into marriage and the subsequent divorce. I have even higher hopes for Lamar and Khloe lasting longer, and that ain't saying much.

*image from


  1. We must be soul sisters becasuse that ring literally caused a physical reaction in me---and not a good one. Gross.

  2. Yikes... even for her this is too much of a mess. Lock it up J-simps.

  3. PS - I cant figure out how the hell to make my name stop saying Tina with all that squiggly shit after it...

  4. Why not put a sapphire in that hot mess if you had to put anything in there.. yikes!